No matter how tough of a woman one can be, having to lose a child is something no parents is ever prepared for.
When I heard the news of the five-year-old girl, Nurhayada Sofia who plunged to death at Kenanga Wholesale City Mall last Friday, my heart palpitated with fear and paranoia.
READ ALSO: Girl, 6, falls to her death at KL shopping mall
READ ALSO: Traders recall child's tragic fall in Kenanga Mall
I did not dare to even take a peek at the mall’s surveillance videos showing this poor little girl’s moments of death when it went viral on the internet.
It was then reported that Nurhayada and her sister had been playing near the escalators when the incident occurred. Their mother was on the phone with their father – giving him reasons to why they were out without his permission. She was so engrossed with the conversation that when the mishap took place, it was already too late.
The loss of a child is just unbearable and parents are simply not supposed to outlive their children.
I sort of know this feeling.
When I had a miscarriage in 2008, I was not at all prepared for a new bud of life to form in my system. In fact I did not even know I was pregnant. I ignored the signs and the changes I was going through.
I remember my OB/GYN then, was furious at me for not being aware and putting in effort into tracking my menses.
I was close to my second trimester (apparently) when I bled and when I found out I was pregnant and it was too late, my heart wrenched.
Discreetly, for a few weeks or so, I was battling with guilt and depression – I felt I have only myself to blame for not caring enough towards my very own physical being, as well as the changes my body was experiencing then.
At that time, I was thinking to myself, if only I knew that I was pregnant, if only I keep and take note of myself and my surroundings, I would have not pushed myself physically, mentally and emotionally, the way I did then. And maybe just maybe, I could have had saved my baby.
It took many days for me to come to terms with my miscarriage, every single day, I was struggling with happiness. Even though I did not have the chance to ‘feel’ the presence of my little bean in me, I was certainly grieving.
I was grieving for a form of life that I never knew.
To me, grief is like a pendulum swing of love, the more you love, the more difficult it is to let go and I don’t think any parents could ever catapult themselves from grieve into normalcy, ever, after having had to lose a child like Nurhayada.
They say time heals all wounds but in cases such as his, it is exceptional.
When I had Lily a year after my miscarriage and three years later, Luth and then Ruby, never once have I stopped thinking about the fear of losing any one of my child.
Though my miscarriage story can never come close to the horror and grieve the parents of the five year old Nurhayada (and the likes of her) are facing, however, the plot is almost the same - the life of an innocent child could be saved if only parents are more attentive.
When I heard the news of the five-year-old girl, Nurhayada Sofia who plunged to death at Kenanga Wholesale City Mall last Friday, my heart palpitated with fear and paranoia.
READ ALSO: Girl, 6, falls to her death at KL shopping mall
READ ALSO: Traders recall child's tragic fall in Kenanga Mall
I did not dare to even take a peek at the mall’s surveillance videos showing this poor little girl’s moments of death when it went viral on the internet.
It was then reported that Nurhayada and her sister had been playing near the escalators when the incident occurred. Their mother was on the phone with their father – giving him reasons to why they were out without his permission. She was so engrossed with the conversation that when the mishap took place, it was already too late.
The loss of a child is just unbearable and parents are simply not supposed to outlive their children.
I sort of know this feeling.
When I had a miscarriage in 2008, I was not at all prepared for a new bud of life to form in my system. In fact I did not even know I was pregnant. I ignored the signs and the changes I was going through.
I remember my OB/GYN then, was furious at me for not being aware and putting in effort into tracking my menses.
I was close to my second trimester (apparently) when I bled and when I found out I was pregnant and it was too late, my heart wrenched.
Discreetly, for a few weeks or so, I was battling with guilt and depression – I felt I have only myself to blame for not caring enough towards my very own physical being, as well as the changes my body was experiencing then.
At that time, I was thinking to myself, if only I knew that I was pregnant, if only I keep and take note of myself and my surroundings, I would have not pushed myself physically, mentally and emotionally, the way I did then. And maybe just maybe, I could have had saved my baby.
It took many days for me to come to terms with my miscarriage, every single day, I was struggling with happiness. Even though I did not have the chance to ‘feel’ the presence of my little bean in me, I was certainly grieving.
I was grieving for a form of life that I never knew.
To me, grief is like a pendulum swing of love, the more you love, the more difficult it is to let go and I don’t think any parents could ever catapult themselves from grieve into normalcy, ever, after having had to lose a child like Nurhayada.
They say time heals all wounds but in cases such as his, it is exceptional.
When I had Lily a year after my miscarriage and three years later, Luth and then Ruby, never once have I stopped thinking about the fear of losing any one of my child.
Though my miscarriage story can never come close to the horror and grieve the parents of the five year old Nurhayada (and the likes of her) are facing, however, the plot is almost the same - the life of an innocent child could be saved if only parents are more attentive.
"And know that what has befallen you was not going to miss you, and that which missed you was not meant to befall you” – Prophet Muhammad
